There are only three guarantees in life: Death, taxes … and Le’Veon Bell crushing his former divisional foes.

Charting his last eight games against AFC North clubs, the newly minted Jets tailback boasts sky-high numbers of 150 total yards and 1.1 touchdowns.

The Steelers have had a Week 2 home opener for five consecutive seasons (counting this week vs. Seattle).

Of the previous four opening outings, quarterback Ben Roethlisberger has been a model of consistency for Pittsburgh, averaging 331 yards passing and 2.8 touchdowns.

What’s more, Big Ben passed for 456 yards and one touchdown in his meeting with the Seahawks.

Fantasy owners don’t need additional ammunition to start Patrick Mahomes (378 yards passing, 3 TDs last week), who should have no problem clearing $4,700 yards passing and 40 touchdowns this year.

Here’s something interesting, though: The Raiders inexplicably allowed the fewest completions to opposing quarterbacks last season … and the most passing touchdowns to the same lot of signal-callers.

Mahomes’ career output versus Oakland: Tidy averages of 288 yards passing and three touchdowns … with the Chiefs eclipsing 30-plus points in both instances.

The Eagles had difficulty stopping the Redskins’ playmakers last week (370 yards passing allowed); and that trend should continue this weekend in Atlanta.

Charting his last four outings against the Eagles, including the playoffs, Falcons wideout Julio Jones boasts supreme averages of 9.5 catches, 15.5 targets, 137 yards and 0.5 touchdowns per game.

The Dolphins were crushed like few teams in NFL history last week, falling to the Ravens, 59-10. However, there was one quirky positive to celebrate from a fantasy standpoint:

Miami was the only Week 1 defense that didn’t allow a single receiving target to an opposing tailback.

Will this low-target trend hold up Sunday against the vaunted Patriots?

Well, of his eight career outings against the Dolphins, Patriots tailback James (87 catches, 123 targets last year) has collected three or fewer receptions six times.

Fantasy connoisseurs should expect a Week 2 bounce-back from Cowboys tailback Ezekiel Elliott.

Citing his five career outings versus the Redskins, the three-time NFL rushing champion owns stellar averages of 109 total yards and 1.2 touchdowns; and that includes a 42-yard, zero-TD clunker from last year.

Tight end Delanie Walker (2 TDs last week) has enjoyed a strong track record against the Colts since joining the Titans in 2013.

Citing his last 10 outings versus Indy, Walker has produced five games of one touchdown, six efforts five-plus receptions and seven games of double-digit PPR points.

On the down side, Walker has never tallied multiple touchdowns in back-to-back games.

Bengals quarterback Andy Dalton (418 yards passing, 2 TDs last week) looks to be a perfect fit in Zac Taylor’s go-for-broke offense, which called for 51 pass attempts in Week 1, despite the scoring differential being relatively tight throughout the game.

Which brings us to this: Of Dalton’s last four outings against NFC West defenses, the nine-year veteran sports elite-level averages of 324 yards passing and 2.5 touchdowns.

Here’s a fair warning to fantasy owners: Citing the last five NFL seasons (2014-18), history tells us that Colts wideout T.Y. Hilton will dominate the Titans once per year … and then be near-invisible for the other matchup.

In other words, good luck guessing which Hilton shows up Sunday in Nashville.

Here are two clues that protend a sluggish Week 2 effort:

**Hilton has never posted 100 yards receiving in a road game during September.

**Charting the 10 times Hilton has notched multiple touchdowns (including the playoffs), he found the end zone the following week (or game) just once — his rookie campaign of 2012.

And last but not least …

There are three rock-solid stats to celebrate with the Saints’ Alvin Kamara, our No. 1 PPR tailback for Week 2:

a) Kamara has notched 100 total yards in his last five games (including the playoffs).

b) Charting his last five outings on natural grass, Kamara holds sterling averages of 123 total yards and 0.8 touchdowns.

c) Of the greatest importance, check out Kamara’s averages in three lifetime meetings with the Rams: 128 total yards and 1.7 touchdowns per game.