There are three certainties in life: Death, taxes … and Derrick Henry torching the Jaguars defense, whenever humanly possible.

Counting his previous six meetings with Jacksonville, Henry owns otherworldly averages of 121 total yards and 1.5 touchdowns.

Here’s another thing to celebrate: Henry has accounted for 99 total yards and/or one TD seven times in his last eight games.

For Week 2, we didn’t require extra motivation to finagle a top-five ranking for Aaron Rodgers (364 yards passing, 4 TDs last week).

Here’s why:

****Rodgers has accounted for 300 yards passing and/or multiple touchdowns in 10 straight home openers.

****The Lions ranked in the bottom seven last year with opposing quarterbacks, in terms of touchdown passes, completions and passing yards surrendered.

****Charting his previous eight outings versus Detroit, Rodgers boasts elite-level averages of 298 yards passing and 2.9 TDs.

BATSBY Sports has Christian McCaffrey ranked as fantasy’s No. 1 tailback this week, out of loyalty to two glowing nuggets:

a) The Panthers star (2,392 total yards, 19 TDs last year) holds robust averages of 107 total yards and 1.3 touchdowns in his last four meetings with the Buccaneers.

b) McCaffrey (134 total yards, 2 TDs last week) has reached the elite-level threshold of 100 total yards and/or one TD in 15 straight outings.

Of course, it’s also worth noting: McCaffrey’s streak for the above factoid began after his sluggish Week 2 outings versus Tampa Bay last season (53 total yards, zero scores).

T.Y. Hilton’s annual destruction of the Texans defense has been well-chronicled through the years.

You know what doesn’t garner regular mention, when discussing the Indy wideout’s track record?

Check this out:

Charting his last 11 home outings against non-conference foes, dating back to 2014, the remarkably consistent Hilton holds strong averages of six catches, 100 yards and 0.7 touchdowns; and that includes last year’s clunker of 26 yards versus the Panthers.

The Steelers have conducted five straight home openers in Week 2, including last year’s real-time torture of quarterback Ben Roethlisberger incurring a major elbow injury (vs. Seattle).

Now for the good news: For those Week 2 home openers from 2015-18, Big Ben posted amazingly consistent averages of 323 yards passing and three touchdowns.


PASSING FANCY: QB-starter rankings for Week 2
RUN TO DAYLIGHT: Week 2’s listing of top 60 PPR tailbacks
CATCHES AND TARGETS: Top 70 PPR wideouts for Week 2
LARGE AND IN CHARGE: Week 2’s top 30 PPR tight ends
GET TO WORK: 7 reasonable buy-low options to acquire before Week 2
FREE AGENCY: Top 30 waiver-wire pickups for NFL Week 2

IMPRESS YOUR FRIENDS: 15 super-fun facts to ponder for NFL Week 2

This seems like the ideal week to ride Dak Prescott in any type of fantasy league.

****Last week against the Rams, the Cowboys’ four main playmakers (Ezekiel Elliott, Amari Cooper, Michael Gallup, CeeDee Lamb) caught 21 of 29 targeted balls.

****The Falcons (Sunday’s foe) surrendered the 10th-most touchdown passes last season; and last week, Atlanta was one of only two NFL defenses to give up four TD passes.

****At home last season, Prescott enjoyed an eight-game average of 303 yards passing and 2.5 touchdowns.

On the flip side … in two career meetings, Prescott has never tossed a scoring pass against the Falcons.

There’s a good news/meh news proposition involving Chiefs tight end Travis Kelce this week:

Charting his last 11 outings (including the postseason), Kelce has scored eight touchdowns and tallied a terrific catch-to-target rate of 82 percent.

On the down swing, citing his last seven games against the Chargers, Kelce collected three or fewer receptions four different times.

In other words, Kelce (preseason No. 1 tight end) hardly represents a lock for Sunday’s top five.

It’s a good thing wideout Allen Robinson has cleared the air with Bears management, after earlier talks for a major contract extension reportedly fell flat.

The eminently bankable Robinson has collected eight-plus targets in seven straight games, dating back to last year’s 131-yard, one-TD effort against the Giants (Sunday’s opponent).

What’s more, citing his last eight home outings with Chicago, Robinson registered nine-plus targets or scored at least one touchdown six times.

The Patriots, coming off a No. 6 ranking in rushing yards allowed (2019), have been particularly stingy with opposing running backs lately, allowing only Joe Mixon and Derrick Henry to break the 100-yard rushing mark after last year’s bye.

However, there’s hope for a third rusher joining that semi-exclusive club.

Charting his last eight games against non-NFC West opponents, Seahawks RB Chris Carson (two-year average: 1,405 total yards, 9 TDs) owns rock-solid averages of 103 total yards and 0.7 touchdowns.

We’re a little nervous about Cooper Kupp’s top-10 ranking among wide receivers, and it has little to do with Robert Woods’ 105-yard effort from last week.

Here’s why:

****Kupp has quickly developed a reputation for being streaky with touchdowns. When things are good, it’s poetry in fantasy motion; and when it’s bad … things sort of snowball from there.

****The Eagles (Sunday opponent) were a bottom-6 pass defense last season, citing the crucial categories of targets, receiving yards and receiving touchdowns allowed to opposing wideouts.

****The last time he entered Pennsylvania state lines (November 2019), Kupp left Heinz Field with zero catches and four targets.

Giants tailback Saquon Barkley has taken a few snarky hits on social media this week (see above Tweet), after Monday’s inglorious effort of 15 carries for six yards (0.4 yards per rush).

But we’re not worried about any prolonged slumps involving Barkley.

Counting the previous 29 games of his brief, but decorated career, Barkley had produced eight outings of less than 50 yards rushing. For the follow-up performances, however, the Penn State product notched 100 total yards and/or one touchdown seven times.

What’s more, citing last year’s stats, the Bears ranked in the bottom 11 with rushing touchdowns, targets, receiving yards and receptions allowed to opposing running backs.

Mark Ingram racked up five outings of multiple touchdowns last season, including his 85-yard, two-TD effort against the overmatched Texans (41-7 final).

Which puts us in the mood for the following nugget:

Of his 16 games of multiple scores, dating back to 2014, Ingram registered 20 or more carries only four times.

Cardinals fans are undoubtedly pumped about DeAndre Hopkins’ home debut with the new club, on the heels of last week’s 14-catch, 151-yard gem (road upset of the 49ers).

But there should also be tangible enthusiasm reserved for another new-ish acquisition, tailback Kenyan Drake.

Of his four NFL outings at University of Phoenix Stadium, Drake holds supreme averages of 107 total yards and 1.3 touchdowns.

And don’t forget about Drake’s thrilling kick-return touchdown in the 2016 College Football Playoff title game at the same stadium, the perfect capper to 218 all-purpose yards in Alabama’s 45-40 victory over Clemson.

Here’s a somewhat troubling trend worth tracking:

Citing his last eight games played in the Eastern Time Zone, including the Super Bowl in February (Miami), Niners tight end George Kittle has not once found the end zone.

And last but not least …

The Dolphins surrendered the most passing touchdowns last year (39), an incredible feat when factoring in Miami’s 11th-place finish in fewest cumulative completions allowed to opposing quarterbacks.

Which brings us to this …

Josh Allen might have missed two wide-open playmakers in the end zone last week (Dawson Knox, John Brown on separate possessions), but he still came through with strong numbers against the Jets — 33 of 46 for 312 yards and three total touchdowns.

Does this make him a supreme candidate for Sunday versus Miami? You betcha!

Counting his last three meetings with the Dolphins, Allen has absurdly averaged 288 total yards and 3.7 touchdowns.


Jay Clemons, the 2008 Fantasy Football Writer of the Year and 2015 Cynopsis Media award winner for “Sports Blog Of The Year,” has previously served as a lead fantasy analyst for Sports Illustrated, FOX Sports South, Bleacher Report and